10 weekly check-in questions for couples to deepen emotional intimacy

When we talk about physical intimacy in a romantic relationship, things like holding hands, hugging, kissing, etc. usually come to mind.

However, fostering emotional intimacy is just as important, if not more crucial, than physical intimacy in any romantic relationship. In fact, it’s one of the main things that distinguishes it from other types of relationships.

The closeness and connection between two people who feel safe and secure with each other is known as emotional intimacy. But it’s much more complex than just ‘closeness’. It involves the idea of someone else seeing, knowing and understanding you. It involves developing a close relationship and understanding.

“If you’re feeling distant from your partner, open-ended questions are a great way to increase your closeness. Ask these questions weekly to check in on how your relationship is doing,” says Amanda Twiggs, marriage coach and relationship counsellor. She further shared some important weekly check-in questions for couples to deepen emotional intimacy.

Weekly Emotional Intimacy Check-Ins for Couples
1. What is something you’re proud of this week?

Share your achievements and what made you proud this week. It can be something simple.

2. What was the most difficult part of your week?

Discuss the challenges you faced during the week.

3. How could I have better supported you this week?

Explore how your partner could have provided better support during those struggles.

4. What are your goals for next week?

Share what you aim to accomplish in the coming week.

5. What can I do to support your goals?

Discuss ways your partner can assist you in achieving your goals.

6. When did you feel most connected with me this week?

Share when you felt most connected during the week.

7. What is one loving action you’d like from me this coming

week?

Examples: handholding, hugging, help with housework, emotional support etc.

8. What if anything upset you this week?

Explore if either of you experienced triggers during the week.

9. How can I best support you when you are feeling upset?

Perhaps it’s more emotional validation, empathy, or just simply listening.

10. What is something you would like to do together next week?